Can You Feel the Chi? (Cool, 'Cause I Can't..)
Wednesday, April 14, 2010 at 07:55PM | 6 Comments I got a lot of wonderful responses to my last blog post (most of which, regrettably, appeared in my inbox or on my Facebook page.)
But the most challenging and thought-provoking comment came through the blog itself, from a friend I made online about a year or so ago... one who was only then just thinking about a career as a massage therapist, and is now facing a challenge that I remember facing (and actually, still do on occasion).
I had to request a little clarity on one of her statements, but while I am still waiting for her response, I will offer a brief anecdote of my own.
I'm pretty sure I've said it here before, that I've never considered myself a highly intuitive type. When I started shiatsu school, I had the impression that it was just about pressing various specific places on people which the intention of having some kind of effect, and it was all just a matter of learning where. The idea that shiatsu was working with 'chi' and therefore, some type of unquantifiable force, didn't occur to me to possibly being a challenge.
Several weeks into the first level, when people in my class were raving about 'feeing energy', and 'pulses' and 'seeing colors' and all manner of esoteric whatever, I was thinking these folks are either completely full of shit, or I'm totally dense. I worried that I was never going to get this, I was never going to have that sensitivity, and maybe I was really in the wrong field. (I should note, that like Jessica, my commentor, I started with Reiki, but shall address that in a later post.)
I limped along, learning the meridians and the points, making like I was perfectly aware of what chi felt like, that I could totally feel the 'echo' between my 'mother and child hands', and I would spend countless hours going cross-eyed as I fruitlessly tried to visualize the aura of my teachers up against the chalkboard.
I maintained this story to myself, about my energetic obliviousness, throughout the second level of shiatsu school, until I finally realized I had to at least start telling myself a different story. One that included the possibility that I'm not incapable of getting this stuff, I just haven't yet. And that it probably wasn't going to appear like a billboard with big blinking lights and arrows and a singing telegram, announcing, 'Yes, girl! You got it!'
That was a good first step.
Reader Comments (6)
Thank you for picking my question :). Just sent you an email that (hopefully) clarifies.
What you've articulated is a big part of it. Sometimes I think about the song "Nothing" from A Chorus Line. For those who don't know it - It's sung by a girl who was at a high school for the arts and she hated her acting class. Everyone in the class would talk about how they "felt" various things they were acting out. And she felt nothing. And her teacher told her she'd never be an actress. So she switched to a school that was a better fit for her, and she became an actress. For me the point of that song is that we all have something different to bring to the table. Some of us take longer to learn certain things. Just because our path to something might be different, doesn't mean we're wrong.
And the other night I was trying so hard to see someone's aura that I gave myself a headache. I guess I'm just not there yet!
Jessica: i love that story. And please stay tuned for more of mine. You're right about having different paths... PS: I still can't see auras...
This may have absolutely no bearing on what you've described ... but what pops out at me is, we all tend to have these big fat (and usually hairy) ExPecTaTions about what things like "chi" are supposed to feel like.
Maybe you absolutely feel it, but it's not what you expect, so you're not *seeing* it?
I know how many times I've done that...and ended up saying to myself, or to my teacher, "OH! THAT was what you meant! Wow, that wasn't what I thought it would be at all!"
So I just thought I'd mention it. :)
Well, yes, Grace, right on! This is where I was going, and will be continued in the next post.. :) Thanks for commenting!
Thanks for this post! I had the same issue in acupuncture school. I'm so left brained that I didn't think I would ever get the subtle nuances of feeling energy. It took me a while to realize that I *was* feeling the Qi, but for me it took a more physical form-- a feeling that the needle just stopped at the right place.
Yes! Left-brained.. Virgo that I am. And yes, all along it was there, just not in the way I was expecting... Thank you Emily!